June is the season of promotions, graduations, and weddings! As each stage of life leads to more independence, it is good to reflect, “Am I creating a home environment that draws the family back home?” Is home a welcome place for my kids and their friends? Will my college student want to come back for holidays and school breaks? When she gets married, will they initiate visits? When he has his own family, will we still be connected?
Our homes make an impression through the atmosphere, attitudes, and activities we create. What is the magnet that leads your children home?
Atmosphere
Healthy homes are meant to be a place of comfort and security. Every home has its own unique different atmosphere created by sounds, smells, and sights. Cheering for your favorite sports team together. The fragrance of a favorite meal on the stove. Laughter from family card games. Christmas ornaments that decorate the tree every year. Pizza night. Baking cookies. Favorite snacks. Board games. Movie night. Silly jokes. These gestures, big and small, can evoke comforting memories and create the atmosphere of our home.
What are the sounds, smells, sights, and tastes that bring your children comfort?
Attitudes
Our children are also a reflection of our home attitudes. We want our homes to be a learning lab for imperfect people. Home is a place where it is OK to fail. Where we learn from mistakes. Where creativity is encouraged. Where character is honored. Where we deal with real issues. Where we enjoy time together even though everything has not been resolved. Where we choose to be grateful for what we have.
Our words are very powerful and affect the attitudes in our home. Remember to think before speaking (or not speaking). Take responsibility for what you say, and be careful to follow through with promises you make to your children. Ask for forgiveness when you hurt with your words, and teach your children how to handle what is said to them. Our words leave life messages. Take the time to speak into your child, “I love you. I’m proud of you. I trust you. I believe in you.”
What can you say to encourage your child?
Activities
Activities in our home create the rhythm of our family. It isn’t just the fun stuff, but it also includes the routine things that develop character. They are the meals, conversations, chores, homework, vacations, games, family events, church attendance, after-school activities, mini-excursions, etc. These events create the backdrop of the stories that we will tell and retell through the years.
What is one of your family activities that is making an impression on your children now?
Is there a special activity you want to continue?
Is there an activity you should omit?
Home impressions can last for generations. In our atmosphere, attitudes, and activities, we send the message:
- I am special because I am important to be with.
- I have great ideas.
- I can relax and be myself.
- I can fail and still come home.
- What I say is worth being heard.
- What I like in food matters.
- We get really irritated with each other, but we can learn to live together.
- We are all very different.
- Mom and dad love me.
- Our home is crazy, but a great place to be
Between Eden and Heaven is our home. Take the time to create a cozy place and develop the relationships in your home.