Growing in Character

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Adrea Scheidler Photography

Adrea Scheidler Photography

Dear Joyce,

Now that your children are grown, what do you think I should focus on as a mom?  I have three children, and I want to make sure I can look back 20 years from now and know that I did it “right!”

Thanks, Susan

Dear Susan,

I have been a mom for 40 years and now have a better understanding that being a mom is a “ministry” with long range results that impact generations.  I can see that who I was as a person made more of an impact than what I did!  I would suggest that you focus on your character issues and mentor your children on character because CHARACTER MATTERS!  If you are not intentional on working on your flaws, you will be distracted by the many obvious misbehaviors of your children.  If you are working on your flaws, you will be able to talk to your children with authenticity.  Your example and your teaching will have tremendous results.  You won’t see the ultimate impact now.  Have a heart for God.  Keep growing.  Stay close to your kids so they will see the reflection of Jesus in your life.  One of the best gifts you can give your children is your long time commitment and caring love of your husband.  Parents should not take all the credit or all the blame for the person their child becomes.  The child also has to cooperate with the choices he makes.  We have a responsibility to model character to our children, to mentor them, and to ask for forgiveness when we fail.

As moms, we are called to be faithful, no matter how our child behaves, no matter what the outcome.  Explore practical ways to grow personally, in your relationship with our spouse and to help your children grow up healthy.  Take bite size portions.  One character quality shift a month, one better behavior today.  When my music students practice, they get better at whatever they rehearse.  Practice, practice, practice new behaviors.

1 Timothy 4:15,16
Practice (immerse) yourself in them (Scripture, exhortation, and teaching) so that all may see your progress.  Keep a close watch on yourself and the teaching.  (ESV)
 
Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.”
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