Dear Joyce,
I saw a chart of chores children should be doing when they are 2-3 years old, preschoolers, elementary, middle school, etc. It was a huge list such as having toddlers dusting, emptying the dishwasher, washing baseboards . . . and having preschoolers vacuuming, washing dishes, and much more. What are your thoughts on chores?
Cindy
Dear Cindy,
First of all, I would not want my toddler emptying the dishwasher, or my preschooler doing some of the chores on this list. I think it is very important for children to help and do appropriate chores and to add responsibilities as they grow older. A big responsibility for children is their education (homework, practicing music skills/sports . . .) and learning to contribute to the family.
I have seen chore lists that are excessive, in my opinion. I am so glad that my parents did not follow a list like this and rather gave us plenty of time to do homework, music, and to play – part of the work of a child – and I was raised in a Mennonite-German home in the 1950’s. We wanted our daughters to be a part of the “team” and to help by doing chores, but as long as they were faithfully studying and practicing, we were happy to do a lot of the chores ourselves. What we felt was inappropriate was kids laying on a couch if mom or dad were busy working. We also expected them to respond when we asked for help. We equipped our daughters to know how to run a household, however, learning these tasks did not become part of their daily/weekly chores when they were in school.
Some moms use their children to do their work and some moms are afraid to ask their children to do anything. Balance is important. I believe it is our job to model and mentor our children, boys and girls, but not to have them spend their childhood doing housework. I have talked to many burned out women who spent their childhood doing chores and being the Cinderella . . . not the princess part! Our job is to be an example and to equip our children so they will have the skills and energy to do it for their children and so on.
Hope this is encouraging to you!
Love, Joyce