{"id":138,"date":"2011-07-11T15:27:57","date_gmt":"2011-07-11T22:27:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/?p=138"},"modified":"2011-07-27T17:16:38","modified_gmt":"2011-07-28T00:16:38","slug":"dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/","title":{"rendered":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . ."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Adrea<\/a>
\nDear Joyce,<\/p>\n

I wanted to ask you for your advice about our 3 year-old.\u00c2\u00a0 She is FEARFUL of so many things – almost anything with loud noise (dogs, trains, fireworks, people who speak loudly- including my brother and her teacher).\u00c2\u00a0 If\/when she sees or hears anything she is afraid of, she will cry hysterically and sometimes can’t contain herself. \u00c2\u00a0She is also scared to go to sleep (so bedtime is a challenge every evening). \u00c2\u00a0We just DO NOT understand her fears. \u00c2\u00a0We have tried to calm her, talked to her about the things she fears, prayed for her and with her, but she is still so scared and most of the times she will just cry and cannot\/will not communicate with us, which tests our patience. \u00c2\u00a0 Can you please give us advice on how to deal\/help her get over them\/give her confidence\/etc.?<\/p>\n

Susan<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Dear Susan,<\/em><\/p>\n

It sounds like you are parenting well.\u00c2\u00a0 Realize that when a child, or any human, is deep in their emotions, they do not think clearly.\u00c2\u00a0 You will not get answers when she is in the middle of her fears. <\/em><\/p>\n

Recommendation: Hold her firmly, not tightly, and whisper, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I love you and with mommy (daddy) you are safe!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d\u00c2\u00a0 When she says, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Leave me alone,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I would stay in the room and say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153 I am going to stay with you!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00c2\u00a0 She may or may not like it but stay \u00e2\u20ac\u201c stroke her or simply be in the room. \u00c2\u00a0 She really needs you to be calmly \u00e2\u20ac\u0153in charge\u00e2\u20ac\u009d when she is out of control! \u00c2\u00a0When she is not crying or in the\u00c2\u00a0middle of an \u00e2\u20ac\u0153episode\u00e2\u20ac\u009d teach and talk about her fears, i.e. dogs, how some people talk loudly, some softly (the things that scare her).\u00c2\u00a0 Gradually introduce her to some of her fears \u00e2\u20ac\u201c a fire station, a friendly dog.\u00c2\u00a0 You can hold her and\u00c2\u00a0tell her that she is safe and that the firetruck is safe and a helper and explain how it helps etc.\u00c2\u00a0 She has fears, however, her reactions can come out of habits now so you want to work on building new choices, new habits of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153what\u00c2\u00a0we say and do when we are afraid!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

Habits do not change overnight so realize when you try something, it has to be repeated and consistent for a new habit to be learned. <\/em><\/p>\n

Blessings, Joyce<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dear Joyce, I wanted to ask you for your advice about our 3 year-old.\u00c2\u00a0 She is FEARFUL of so many things – almost anything with loud noise (dogs, trains, fireworks, people who speak loudly- including my brother and her teacher).\u00c2\u00a0 If\/when she sees or hears anything she is afraid of, she will cry hysterically and sometimes can’t contain herself. \u00c2\u00a0She is also scared to go to sleep (so bedtime is… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":194,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9,30,6,29,10],"tags":[39],"class_list":["post-138","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-daughters","category-dear-joyce","category-mothers","category-preschool","category-sons","tag-fears"],"yoast_head":"\nDear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Warm an' Loving Ministries\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/warmanloving\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"900\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"400\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@mjwarmanloving\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@mjwarmanloving\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/d647648ab1d90ce2777daa3a4e1b29fd\"},\"headline\":\"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . .\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\"},\"wordCount\":400,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"fears\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Daughters\",\"Dear Joyce\",\"Mothers\",\"Preschool\",\"Sons\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\",\"name\":\"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00\",\"description\":\"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg\",\"width\":\"900\",\"height\":\"400\",\"caption\":\"Adrea Scheidler Photography\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . .\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/\",\"name\":\"Warm an' Loving Ministries\",\"description\":\"Preventing the Hurting, Helping the Healing\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization\"},\"alternateName\":\"Warm an Loving\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Warm an' Loving Ministries\",\"alternateName\":\"Warm an' Loving\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/2018-WL-Logo-drawn.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/2018-WL-Logo-drawn.jpg\",\"width\":2048,\"height\":2048,\"caption\":\"Warm an' Loving Ministries\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/warmanloving\",\"https:\/\/x.com\/mjwarmanloving\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/d647648ab1d90ce2777daa3a4e1b29fd\",\"name\":\"admin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/db3e5fcac7be14a44f8bb180ecab330fff9669211e454ce90fbfca4d5c403943?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/db3e5fcac7be14a44f8bb180ecab330fff9669211e454ce90fbfca4d5c403943?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"admin\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/author\/admin\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries","description":"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries","og_description":"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.","og_url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/","og_site_name":"Warm an' Loving Ministries","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/warmanloving","article_published_time":"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00","article_modified_time":"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00","og_image":[{"width":900,"height":400,"url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"admin","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@mjwarmanloving","twitter_site":"@mjwarmanloving","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"admin","Est. reading time":"2 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/"},"author":{"name":"admin","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/d647648ab1d90ce2777daa3a4e1b29fd"},"headline":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . .","datePublished":"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00","dateModified":"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/"},"wordCount":400,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg","keywords":["fears"],"articleSection":["Daughters","Dear Joyce","Mothers","Preschool","Sons"],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/","url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/","name":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . . - Warm an' Loving Ministries","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg","datePublished":"2011-07-11T22:27:57+00:00","dateModified":"2011-07-28T00:16:38+00:00","description":"Warm an\u2019 Loving is a non-profit counseling and training center dedicated to helping heal individuals, couples, and families through professional counseling and seminars.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/20110711-Post-FeatImg.jpg","width":"900","height":"400","caption":"Adrea Scheidler Photography"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/dear-joyce-my-child-is-afraid\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Dear Joyce, My child is afraid . . ."}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#website","url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/","name":"Warm an' Loving Ministries","description":"Preventing the Hurting, Helping the Healing","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization"},"alternateName":"Warm an Loving","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#organization","name":"Warm an' Loving Ministries","alternateName":"Warm an' Loving","url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/2018-WL-Logo-drawn.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/2018-WL-Logo-drawn.jpg","width":2048,"height":2048,"caption":"Warm an' Loving Ministries"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/warmanloving","https:\/\/x.com\/mjwarmanloving"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/d647648ab1d90ce2777daa3a4e1b29fd","name":"admin","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/db3e5fcac7be14a44f8bb180ecab330fff9669211e454ce90fbfca4d5c403943?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/db3e5fcac7be14a44f8bb180ecab330fff9669211e454ce90fbfca4d5c403943?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"admin"},"url":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/author\/admin\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/138","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=138"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/138\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/194"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=138"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=138"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/warmanloving.org\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=138"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}